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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29982207">Lace Handkerchiefs and Mischief</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seaweaver/pseuds/Seaweaver'>Seaweaver</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Colds, F/F, Messy, Reader is AFAB - Freeform, Reader-Insert, Sneezing, Snot, contagion, noseblowing, sneeze fetish</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-05-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 17:29:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,953</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29982207</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seaweaver/pseuds/Seaweaver</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Yennefer explores and indulges the reader character's sneeze fetish. They have an established relationship. Reader has the fetish and has not discussed it with Yennefer and hasn't put two and two together that they don't need to. Moved from sff because future chapters will include ~*graphic sexual activity*~</p><p>It gets kinda messy. if you like this you know what you're getting into, if you do not like this, it's not going to be offensive so much as probably a little squicky and gross. Think like watersports, but make it snot. You've been warned.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You knew yen wanted to show you a good time. And she had all sorts of magic you’d seen her use to indulge all sorts of folks desires. Somehow, still, it seemed too strange to tell her you got your kicks from *sneezing*. </p><p> </p><p>She’d been rubbing her nose all afternoon and it was getting to you. Hopefully your poker face was sufficient, but Yen always seemed to catch on to these things, she’s perceptive like that. It’s a miracle you ever entered her life, being so shy. Though if she did know what she was doing to you, she didn’t make it known, and it would be impossible to figure out without ensuring it. </p><p>Just now, as she’s across the couch from you in the cottage you shared while the two of you read, or rather, she reads, you stare at a book trying not to blush while she slowly but surely soaks an intricately embroidered handkerchief, suddenly her breath hitches, “ehhhhh-“ and her legs tense up against yours, then she settles back down. You give her a glance that is definitely one of concern, because that’s the appropriate emotion, and she smiles back reassuringly. You settle back into reading your book, or the pretense of reading your book, because you are very distracted but leaving the room would raise questions you weren’t prepared to answer, and just as you make a solid attempt at focusing on what’s his name from whatever book instead of Yennefer’s rose red little nose and how she should just properly blow it already, </p><p>“Aaaaahh-“ once more, this time slightly more sudden and consequently louder, though slowly coming back under her command. Your eyes snap up involuntary, surprised by the sudden noise. Yen is unconcerned by your sudden attention and  rubs her nose hard against her hand, which first quells the itch, then again “ahhhe”, and while this time she’s not actively resisting, it’s still not quite going to be a sneeze. </p><p>Having surpassed the plausible length of time to be startled, you return your gaze to your book, still feeling her fidget around as she tries to find relief. “Ah....... ehhh- mmm-“ You gripped your book tighter, hopefully going unnoticed to yen given her current plight. “Eeeerrrrrrr” she continued to sniff and rub. Ugh, why should mages even get congested? She’s all magically redesigned, but this kind of discomfort was worth leaving in?</p><p>“Ugh, I .. just cant ... ehhhh- seem to -sneeze,” she said looking at you finally.</p><p>You give her a glance you hope is sympathetic, but you don’t trust your voice to keep your experience to yourself.</p><p>“Is... eeeuh... is there anything you ... could do to help ah- ehhh.. me get ..dis out?” </p><p>“Well... I, uh, hmm, I don’t know isn’t this kind of thing usually your forte, maybe some kind of spell “ </p><p>“Un...fortunately no, mages ahhhhrent frequently afflicted               thusly. May- maybe you coubd blow on by ahhhh- eh dose?” You couldn’t believe this was really happening. Had Yen actually just asked you to indulge your incredibly obscure kink *as a favor*?! You surely couldn’t say no without raising suspicion, but you also couldn’t seem too excited. </p><p>“Oh, okay, yeah we, we could try, hopefully it will .. bring you some relief” you say as flatly as you can, shifting on the couch to bring your face to hers, now feeling her breath on your face as it hitched. </p><p>“Ah, I .. hope you don’t ca- catch this” she said, as you brought your face next to hers.</p><p>“It’s okay, I don’t really mind colds so much” you say as neutrally as you can manage, but at all excited to hear that she does in fact have a cold “I find sneezing pretty... cathartic? Anyway”</p><p>“Oh, ahhhhheee, come on dow, thabs just ah- cruel. Do-don’t tease me.” Oh dear god yen you do not know the half of it.</p><p>You take a deep breath in, and you exhale at her face, gently but still pursing your lips to try to make it tickle. </p><p>“Eeeehhhhhhhh-ah-ahhhhhhhe-eeeeuu -fucking hell“ </p><p>“Ah I’m sorry, do you want me to try again”</p><p>“E-ah, yes. Can you ... ahhhhh can you.. try to get right up ahhhunder my dose?”</p><p>You draw another deep breath in, and move to blow into her nostrils. You blow up into them, and yen looks for a second like it might be working, so you quickly take another breath and blow right after the first, hoping it’s enough.</p><p>“Ehhhh-ahhhhhhhhhhhhh-aaaaaht-CHIEOUW” “ahhhhhhtchuew” “eeeeishiew” she finally sneezes, blasting you in the process. “Oh god I’m so sorry” she says smiling at you “but oh dear thank you so much- HATchew- ooh my I guess this is finally ready to AITCHooo be a sneezy cobde instead of edless itching. HAptcgew! Though by the looks -ahhh- of it, you’re almost definitely going-haptchew-to catch it. ” she says taking her sopping handkerchief and trying to wipe some of the mess off your face, still right up under her nose. “I hope- ah- I hope you don’t mind getting this sneezy cold, do you?”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. talking, because communication is important</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I’m sorry it’s not porn yet :( part of it is that this has been a surprisingly vulnerable process for me, but also we stan enthusiastic and explicit consent, and as this is going to be a sort of ramble within the same fictional universe, despite the lack of overarching narrative, developing the relationship is important to me. I’d love requests!</p><p> </p><p>“Um, no I mean you can’t help it”</p><p>“Good because, aeahhhhhh- dis one ib a whopper axcheiw! And I know ids bound to be settling down in your nose as we speak” she said as you did in fact notice a faint pressure in your sinuses.</p><p>“Oh god”</p><p>“I aehh- cabt wait do see you ahptcheou! All stuffed up and powerless as sneeze after sneeze wracks your body” Yen says as she leans over you, moving her legs to straddle you, pushing her hips into yours. “Is this okay?” She says as your eyes roll back into your head and you can’t help but moan, feeling so much at once; shame and confusion and white hot need pulsed though you body as you pushed your hips, searching for friction. </p><p>“Um” you nodded and took a deep breath. Yenefer leaned back onto her feet and took your hand. The loss of contact burned but the newfound air cooled and soothed. </p><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>“I- I’m okay. I mean I’m confused, but I’m, uh, you haven’t upset me”</p><p>“I’m sorry , I thought this way would be easier”</p><p>“What do you mean?” Your face burned.</p><p>“I’ve noticed something that pleases you, and I didn’t bring it up because you’re so shy, but I’ve a keen interest in pleasing you, but I should’ve asked for permission, It’s just you’ve nothing to fear on my account and I was trying to show you that in the gentlest way possible” She noticed. She wants to indulge you. </p><p>“Um, it’s okay, uh I didn’t realize I was that transparent but I think I’m glad you’ve, uh, brought it up.”</p><p>“Oh darling it’s nothing like that, you have nerves of steel, even though I’ve been busting my ass to seduce you. I’m sorry it’s never come up, but my understanding is of a magical nature.”</p><p>“Oh” </p><p>“Yeah, I try to respect your privacy, but vague whiffs are involuntary and since you’re so shy about what you want, I got tempted to peek.”</p><p>“So you know that…”</p><p>“You like sneezing. And snot, and colds, and nose blowing, and all sorts of fun things like that. And I for one personally cannot wait to explore this with you if you’ll let me. I’d aaeeeeh- lobe to stick my ahhhhh-absolutely dripping with cold nose in your aeahhhh dripping pussy eetchew!”</p><p>“And you’re not freaked out?” </p><p>“Love, I think anything moral that excites one is wonderful to know. It’s like a bonus, and it’s freely available, with or without a mage chomping at the bit to conjure your fantasies” she said punctuating the statement with a loud sniff. “And it’s more common than you think, people just don’t talk about it.”</p><p>“Thanks for being so kind to me”</p><p>“I mean it’s nothing special, if you want kind, I’ll show you kind” </p><p>“Yes please.”</p><p>“Could you pass me my handkerchief, ah- I ah- think I’m gonna-ah haetcheiw!” She said, sneezing completely openly, without any movement to cover or reach for the handkerchief herself, snot misting your skin and cascading thickly down her upper lip. “Oh no, it ah- came ah-on to quickly. What an unfortunate mess, can you ah- he-ah help me clean up?” You nodded, mouth dry, as she placed the handkerchief in your hand and took your wrist and kissed it, very gingerly, yet still leaving a wet trail of snot that sent shivers down your spine when the cool air replaced her warm lips. </p><p>You took the, still futily damp, handkerchief and started to slowly wipe her face, as if this were a dream and she should shatter if you were too firm. As you carefully wiped the cloth under her pink, hypersensitive, nostrils, she started to hitch “ea-m eh- ahhhhhh earrm” and she leaned in close to your neck and “ eeeeeahhcheeeew! Hptchew! Erchptchewwww!” Sneezed into your shoulder and down your cleavage. “Oh no, I’m so sorry” she said grinning like an idot, “I just hab to sneedze, bud surely you’re doobed to cadch my sniffles.” She leaned in and kissed you, snot spreading all over your face, as her wet nose rubbed against the drips budding from your own.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Lovin', touchin', sneezin'</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Have i said i like mess yet? because i like mess. A lot. if you do not like mess, this will be too messy.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You felt the tickle long before anything came of it. Sitting quietly at the back of your nose as Yen finally pulled up her dress and climbed onto your lap, moaning at the long awaited pressure of her hips on your own. You couldn’t help buck buck into them, earning you a tight squeeze of her legs around your own as she leaned back inhaling “aaeehhhhhhhhh- chuuuuuueeuu” spraying you with gobs of oozing snot as your tickle finally blossomed into</p><p>“Eeeaahhhhhptchoooo!” All over her soft, plum, breasts sitting up out of her blouse and then again “uhuuuuheiashoo!” As your nose filled with thick wet snot. Yen sniffled and said,</p><p>“Oh- eehhhh- dear, ib looks like you caubt by code, I eeeipchtew! Wobder how dabt habbened?” Winking as she rubbed her wet nose on yours, “do sense in hobing back two node-es both full to the brim with cobd” she said and kissed you wetly and rocked against your hips. “Can this cob ov?” She asked, pulling at your dress. You nodded and she got up, removed her own dress, and sat behind you pressing her bare breasts into your shoulder kissing your neck and then “ahpthchiew!” Spraying down your neck across your chest, as she rubbed her wet nose into your shoulder. She delicately untied the string, letting her fingers run along your back as the she pulled the ends through each grommet. Your nose by this point was absolutely soaking wet, and the urge to sneeze was there but not enough, the sneeze sitting in the tip of your nose as it poured, much like Yen’s own beginnings, as her cold brewed in you. </p><p>“Ahhhhh-, Yed?”</p><p>“Yedz?” She said with a deep sniff as her hands poured around you, reaching through your loose dress and around to your breasts, cupping them, her thumbs resting gently on your nipples. </p><p>“I, uh, ahhhhh- I need to sneebes, and I eahhhh- cab’t”</p><p>“Oh?” She said, resting her head on your shoulder breathing hot, heavy, snotty breaths over your chest, her fingers on your nipples staying perfectly still, but shifting with the movement. </p><p>“Yeah,”</p><p>“That sounds- sniff- like quibe de berdicabent,” she said, giving your breasts the gentlest squeeze, and lifting your skirt, sliding her legs under and against yours. you couldn’t see her shit eating grin, but you could hear it, she knew exactly what she was doing and loved it, and this is one of the many reasons you fell for her. Not only was your pleasure important to her, but she wanted you to ask for it, to know it was yours to take and to be held in not only having what you want but knowing you deserve to ask for it. </p><p>“Cab you aaaahhh- helb be ged id oud? Babey blow ob by nodze like I did for you”</p><p>“Abtheiw!” She sneezed into your face, drawing out a big tickle-</p><p>“Aehhhaehhhh…” the sneeze was shoved to the front of your now red, swollen, heavy, full nose, but it held on for dear life. “Aehhh” Yennefer pulled your dress up over your head, her fingers lingering as she went, sending chills through your hypersensitive body.</p><p>“Esheix!” Yen sneezed into your nose again, bringing back the tickle,</p><p>“Ahhhhhhhhh-“</p><p>“Hapchtew!” She sneezed again as the tickle builded, shoving it on, pressing her bare body against yours as the spray fell over your cheeks and sharply hit your aching nose.</p><p>“Eahheahh”</p><p>“Aitchew!” </p><p>“Eahhhhh- ehhhhhhh- achoooooooooo! Heptcheiw! Aicheeeew!” You sneezed over and over, as thick white cold snot coated your breasts and stomach</p><p>“Eitcheeew!” Yen joined in, her fingers over your snot covered nipples</p><p>“Oh mmmm ahhhecheeew!” You moaned into a sneeze, feeling pure bliss, and sniffed wetly in vain, as Yennefer orbited you once more to straddle your thigh, her leg parting your own and leaned in and kissed you deeply, her wet nose sniffling into yours as her bare stomach slid against your own covered in both of your wet cold spray, and your legs each covered in each others slick, grinding ever so slightly, and despite having barely been touched, you came on the spot. “Ahh, sorry I didn’t bean for thad to habbed yet”</p><p>“I did,” Yen said kissing you on the cheek, lightly grinding her hips, riding you through it. “Aitshoo! Abd I- heptheiw! Bean for ib to habben at least ondce more”. You kissed her wetly once more, your fingers reaching down between her legs, as she pulled them away. “There will be plednty ob time for thad lader, this is aboud you”</p><p>“Ehhh-“ you shifted as a sneeze began to come on. While by this point it would be silly to be shy about sneezing on her, you couldn’t help but feel instinctually like trying not to sneeze directly in her face. Her hands found your cheeks as she looked you in the eye, and blew gently, and steadily until </p><p>“Ehhhheitchew! Eicheeew!” Right all over her face and her own nose, as it twitched in response until </p><p>“Aistchoooooooow!” Pushed your nose over the edge<br/>
“Eichew!” As she held you in this feedback loop, sharing not only a cold but sneeze after sneeze.</p><p>“Aeshew! Aeshoow!” She sneezed wetly back, grinding her damp body on yours, moving down  your body, sneezing a third time “aesheew!” Gently into your breasts, as you sneezed once more </p><p>“Aeeaitchoow!” Leaning your nose into Yen’s cupped palm, followed by a big wet snuffle</p><p>Yennefer continues to move down, tracing your curves with snotty fingers, until she gets to your vulva. </p><p>“Ahhhhhhhh- sniff, ahhheeehhh-“ she breathes over your core, “oh dear, i’b stuck again, cad you rub by nose?” You reach out a finger, and she braces herself on your hips and rubs her nose against it until- “eahhhhh-tchooow!” Sprays over your labia and hips. She then spreads your folds, sticking her nose between then and rubs her nose gently like as if wiping it with a handkerchief, delicately rubbing along the sides of your vulva, ever so slightly bopping your clit with her wet, red, stuffy nose, then briefly lifts her head to “aeaaasheeeew!” Indirectly onto your clit, quickly followed by her tongue, licking up and down just barely next to your needy clit. </p><p>“Eishoo!” You sneezed again, her cold still ever present in your stuffy nose, but you were by no stretch of the word currently uncomfortable. </p><p>“Atcheew! She sneezed, this time into your thigh, which went right to your core, but she then withdrew, eliciting an actual whine from you to which she chuckled wetly and smiled as she turned to retrieve something from your bedroom, coming back with the glass dildo that she’d enchanted a couple weeks prior. “Ahhhh- are you godda wear ib or should I”</p><p>“Cad I?” You said, suddenly very pleased shed gone seeing as it was to retrieve that glorious device. Yennefer being a mage had it’s perks, and as she fastened it around you, you began to feel the way bopped against her wrists, and eventually her hand stroking it, as if it were a real part of your body. You leaned up to kiss her, your glass cock between her warm, soft legs, caressing her but as she pulled back and hitched-</p><p>“Ah- ah-“ gently pushing the appendage every time, and then moaning as you leaned back in to suck her bottom lip, her nose still running along side yours, as you made a mess of each others faces. She then guided the tip into her soaking entrance and sank down onto the cold glass and shivered, and sneezed “aeecheeew!” </p><p>You moaned as you felt her shake around you, though soon felt yourself do the same. “Aitchoo! Aitchoo!” Rocking the rod  up and into her as you did, and the two of you fell into a rhythm of rocking and sneezing around and into each other </p><p>“Mmmm, Aeshoo!”</p><p>“Ohhhhh, heptcheew!”</p><p>“Ugh! Aitchooow!” Yennefer sneezed and thrusted hard, sending you over the edge, and then rode you with fervor chasing her own, cumming hard around the glass. You sat there slumped into each other, noses red and streaming for a few minutes, until yen slid off, grabbed a fresh handkerchief, held it to your nose and said “blow darling”</p>
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